I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

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silent_tears
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I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by silent_tears » Tue Mar 23, 2004 2:49 pm

Over the past couple of weeks, I have been hit with so much confusion in so many areas of my life. Mostly, however, the most stress has come into the area of my life dealing with school. At first, I was going to skip a year after graduation to work and raise up some money for college. When I told my parents this, they thought it was a great idea. Then, I tell some other family members and my guidance counselor and they tell me that it's a bad idea. They say that "if I skip a year after graduation, then I may never get to college."



Also, I feel like I HAVE to go to college, because there's so much pressure on me from my family. My mom has already told me that she thinks I'm the only kid out of her three that will make it to college. My dad started to go to college and then flunked out after 3 months, so he's pressuring me to go as a way of making it up to himself through me. My uncle is a professor at a college, and everytime I go to see him, that's all he wants to talk about! SCHOOL, SCHOOL, SCHOOL!! :wallbash: I am constantly plagued by all these questions:



"Where are you going to college at?"



"Have you thought about what you want to do after high school?"



"What schools have you been looking at?"



"So, when do you start school?"



These questions aren't just from family members, either... I've got my friends and teachers and basically ANYONE that knows me asking me these things every time they see me! I am so stressed out!! I have the ACT's coming up on April 3rd, graduation in about 2 months, and no job... no car... no money. You see, I have such big plans for myself... I have huge dreams. But I know that, coming from a family of limited means, those dreams are pretty far-fetched.



I want to make something of myself... I want to be successful, I want to be happy... I want more than what my parents have - an unhappy, mediocre life just barely making it. (Nothing against my parents. I love them to death.) But I want so much more. I want to touch people. I want to make a difference. Anyone have any advice how to get family members to BACK OFF?!? Thanks.
Because of you, I'm a broken shell of the person that I used to be...

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SirPostAlot
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Re: I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by SirPostAlot » Tue Mar 23, 2004 4:51 pm

Hey! I am exaclty like you are, well w/ the money/family situation. I come from a family were money is very, very rare. I have one parent who rasies 3 teens (2 teens + 1 slower 23 yr. old)...

Life is very rough...

I would say to talk to your uncle (professer)...

What i recall, if you have a family member who works at a university you get a discount and your chances increase (at least that is how it is where i live).

Everyone has high dreams, and money is a big issue. If your dreams are to go to college, then the best thing is to go to college out of school (because what your Guidence counsler said was right the majority of the time). I mean true, you are going to have to get a school loan, but you will be able to pay it back w/ working your job (profession) that you gained from going to college.

I would say to do some reasearch and talk to your uncle and guidence counsler.

Best Wishes! :)



~Jeff~

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Sam!
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Re: I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by Sam! » Tue Mar 23, 2004 6:38 pm

I know your predicament well; probably from a slightly different situation though. I think it's a fine idea to skip a year before going to college, I'd like to do it myself. It gives you a little bit more life experience, you'll be a little more mature, and who the hell knows.... you could end up deciding college isn't what you want. Don't do this for your family, you want to be happy like you said... you need to do what you do for you!!!!!



You are clearly smart... it's good to think about these things, but don't do what I do and start to obsess, I'm only a freshmen and I'm flipping about my future, and someone gav eme this advice... never made sense to me until a few months ago; CHILL. College is NOT everything. You need to decide what YOU want and go by your heart.
-Sam!

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Paris In Flames
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Re: I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by Paris In Flames » Tue Mar 23, 2004 9:47 pm

Hey,



What many people don't realise is that very few people actually go to college. It's like the world assumes that every person is smart enough to go. Right now in Nevada, every person is required to take at least 1 college prep class, whether this kid is the smartest in the school, or mentally retarded. It's insane, and many people just don't realise that there are other things out there besides college.



If you really want to go and feel that there is a good future in the major you want, try to go in. Take a year off if you want to. Just be sure that a year of doing nothing doesn't set into a trend.



Cheers,



Jenna
xMOSHx xHELLA HARDCOREx xBREAKDOWNx



The tragedy is the ignorance behind the clean casket

On the outside, they look so good

They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...

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Re: I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by Shwynsh » Tue Mar 23, 2004 11:13 pm

If you go to college and rush into it, then you won't have the best time. I really suggest taking the year off- go around see things, then go to college. Dont let these people stress you out TOO much- just keep thinking what YOU want.. and try try try not to let them influence you. When they start talking about this just tell them that you're definately capable of thinking about it on your own and you don't need their guidance- and that you'll tell them when you DO need it..
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"I have a feeling that you're riding for some kind of a terrible, terrible fall. . . . This fall I think you're riding for-it's a special kind of fall, a horrible kind. The man falling isn't permitted to feel or hear himself hit bottom. He just keeps falling and falling. The whole arrangement's designed for men who, at some time or other in their lives, were looking for something their own environment couldn't supply them with. Or they thought their own environment couldn't supply them with. So they gave up looking. They gave it up before they ever really even got started"

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silent_tears
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Re: I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by silent_tears » Wed Mar 24, 2004 1:06 pm

Well, I DO know one thing... I DO want to go to college... I want to major in some kind of design, whether it be interior (which is what I really want to do) or media arts or fashion... Anything like that would be great. However, I even told this to some of my family members when they asked me about my major and what I would be studying... When I told them "interior design" they snubbed up their noses and were like, "Oh..."



So, I feel like no matter what I do, I can't win with my family. Design is something that I've been wanting to do since I was little. You can ask my parents! Even at age 8, I was already drawing the floorplans to my "dream house." And you know The Sims? I basically only have that game because I love to build the houses and decorate them. I know, that's sad... But I want to make my family proud.



However, I'm not going to sacrifice my happiness just so they can be proud of me. This is what I really want to do. And I'm going to do it.
Because of you, I'm a broken shell of the person that I used to be...

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faith
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Re: I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by faith » Thu Mar 25, 2004 11:27 am

its a good idea to take a yr break. many ppl take an even longer break then that. alot of ppl do it. dont let anyone influence the positive choices u make. go for it!
~God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble. psalm 46:1-2

~God created people in his own image; God patterned them after himself Genesis 1:27

~Stop judging others, and u will not be judged. Stop criticizing others, or it will all come back on u. Luke 6:37

~There are "friends" who destroy eachother but a real freind sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24

~A fool is quick tempered but a wise person stays calm when insulted. Proverbs 12:16

~The tounge is a small thing but what enormous damage it can do. James 3:5

~Even if my father and mother abandon me the Lord will hold me close. Psalm 27:10

~Get rid of all bitterness...instead be kind to eachother Ephesians 4:31-32

God bless

Love in christ--chelsea

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Re: I Thought I Knew What I Wanted...

Post by cramminus » Thu Mar 25, 2004 10:32 pm

well... in my opinion, what do you want? i mean, draft it out on paper. see how urgent are your needs. after that, get your things together. spend maybe around an hour or two to plan or make yourself some kind of guidelines.

money is always the agenda. however, that is not what's stopping you. it's basickly your commitment and interests. if you'd like to take a year's break, go ahead, but please fill it with things which may help you in your studies. in other words, maybe get a job, even better a job in the field that you want to enter.

everything's up to you. what ever people say, you are you, you are not your father nor your mother nor anyone else. it's your life oing on here, so do what ever suits you. remember, don't turn back and regret, just move on forward and do it. as nike puts it: just do it.

anyway, feel free in sending me a pm. i'm going through what your going through, in a way. wishing you the very best of luck for your act. don't rush it. cross the bridge when you get there.

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