Becoming Something I'm Not

[Jesykah ^_^]

So, I'm not sure exactly where this goes, so feel free to move it.



Anyway, this really isn't a problem, it's just something I've been noticing about myself....



Lately I've felt like a completely different person. I'm less shy, I can somewhat stick up for myself, and I've got a shit load of confidence. But then sometimes I'll go back to the old me... the depressed/lonely me that thinks she isn't worth anything.



I enjoy this feeling of "happiness", and this is the first time in FOREVER that I can truly say I'm content with things as they are. Things could be better, but I'm just fine with how they are.



I'm not sure what exactly made me feel like this. I basically started changing when I lost weight, but that couldn't have changed my whole attitude, could it?



Maybe it could. I'm not sure. All I know is that I'm definitely not the person I used to be. I can see myself changing, and from what I can tell, it's a good thing... I'm just not sure how it happened.

[JazzIsLove]

Losing weight could definitely do alot of that stuff



It gives you more confidence in your outer appearance, therefore giving you even more confidence to shower your inner beauty.



It's happened to me too. brains often seem to take on that "when you've got it, flaunt it" attitude when they know they look good! (as we all do in our own way...just sometimes our brains are fooled by society)



Quite natural that's the main feeling that keeps me going when i exercise and such stuff

[turtbub]

I know just what you mean. I just lost weight, about 20 pounds, and I feel GREAT. I have confidence, I feel good enough for people.



Sometimes the old me surges back but it's easier to squash that "old Hannah" when I'm happy with my outward appearance.



Congrats on being happy with yourself, it's a GREAT feeling.

[Lena]

The unfamiliar has a tendency to bring us to question things, by nature.



Perhaps writing a stream of consciousness about this issue could help you figure out what brought on your mood change, if you really want to pin-point it?



Take care,



Lena.

[Jesykah ^_^]

What sucks though, is how you somewhat let others influence how you feel. For example, just the other day, someone asked me why I lost so much of my upper body but not really any of my belly. And well, I said "I did lose my belly..." and he goes "Well, you need to lose more". And I was like WHAT THE FUCK! I'm already about 17 lbs underweight and here this dude is telling me that I need to lose more. My gosh, being 15 and only 102 lbs just isn't good enough or what?



So now, I'm somewhat back to my old self again... sadly...

[turtbub]

What a JERK.



Honestly Jess, you can't let a**es like that bring you down. You're gorgeous. You're far too skinny if you ask me, but you're beautiful either way.



Don't listen to him.



You're fabulous. And he wants you. He's just jealous because he can't have you. *Sticks out tongue and mean boy*

[Anna_Banana]

hey jessica...



losing weight can change the way you see yourself. so i do believe that may be the case. i'm happy that you're/were feeling better about yourself. try not to let inconsiderate assholes like that guy, bring you down. you're a beautiful person, and no one should make you feel/think otherwise. if you need to talk feel free to pm me.

[Louise]

Hey,



I can understand what you mean, I sometimes feel like that, when I've achieved something - Or changed something about me that I like. I guess we can all get like this at times ?



Love

Louise x

[Trapped]

hmm. I would agree with what's been said...especially 'bout the new change thing, you're just not used it....one reason I know is b/c the same w/ me lately..only I haven't achieved any goal just yet. I think maybe if I did, or at least could talk to ppl about...it..and stuff...it would be easier to accept the change (maybe u could try that- especially if u WANT to accept, but find that u can't ;-)) btw, I was starting to believe it wasn't possible ( for me at least) to lose weight or shape how I wanted, how'd u do that and how long it'd take? j/w.