Disliked/bullied

[Ingenuity]

I was bullied in kindergarden, an outcast in elementary school, in 6th grade I was taken advantage of by some and bullied by the rest so I switched schools. In 7th everyone hated me, so I switched again. In 8th grade only a few people were mean to me, but noone was my friend. They'd say hi in school, but I never got invited anywear. I only got together with people if they wanted homework help or if we were partners in a project. Now I'm in my freshmen year of high school and things are terrible. I'm and outcast amung the outcasts, which I wouldn't entirely mind if everyone else would just leave me alone. From the beginning of the school year people would always laugh at my when I asked questions, make fun of me when I wasn't sure about somthing and I wanted the teacher to explain why I was wrong. They'd say, your wrong, just get over it, and spread rumors about me througout the entire freshmen class. Noone understands that when I question the answer it's not because I want to be right, it's because I don't understand why I am wrong, and I truely want to understand. Everyone takes the teachers word as law, when they make mistakes just like regular people. Our bio teacher said somthing about a question that I knew was wrong. He took about 10 minutes to realize it, so I had to listen to 10 minutes of laughing and people yelling and whispering rhude things at me. and then they didn't even care that I was right, didn't apologise or anything. Eventually I just got fed up with them, and I started to say things back to people. So, then I have the entire class yelling at me, and cussing at me, and telling me I'm trying to act smart and what not. I agree that sometimes I let the things they say effect me more than I should, but it's just to much to handle. Tuesday is biology we were talking about DNA, and I was asking a question about meat v.s. vegetables. The class takes this as an opertunity to make fun of me for being a vegetarian. Yelling out plants have feelings to, your a hypocrit, you'll burn in hell, animals can't feel pain, and then laughing at me when I said things like plants don't have a nervous system. They weren't trying to joke around, they were trying to upset me, which they suceeded in. I was so annoyed that in the next period I yelled at my history teacher about my essay grade. The girl behind me, hit me in the back of the head with rolled up paper so I hit her pen off the desk and she makes a comotion. Then during a film she says "put your big ass head down" and everyone starts laughing. So, I sat up straighter and then she starts a comotion. My history teacher was really pissed off at me. The next day in the period before biology, the incident from tuesday gets dragged up, and everyone is making fun of me, and whispering, and laughing. So instead of go to biology I went to the guidence center for 8th period, but the 9th grade counceler wasn't there. They let me skip the period though. Today I wen't to biology. The kid in front of me kept turning around and whispering things, trying to get me to yell at him. I didn't though, I just politely said ok or nothing at all. At the end of the period though I'm reading my book, a kid comes up from behind and says hey patricia. I turn around and he is holding a plastice bag with a dead frog inside right in my face, and the whole class is laughing at me. I can't go back and say I want to be friends or anything, and I don't know what to do. I came to this school becasue it's the only one in my city that has the I.B. program, and thats the edge I need to get into the college I want to go to. My brother got in without it, but my SAT scores won't be as high as his, and my assay won't be as good. There are ton's of kids like me who will try to get in, and I really want to be one of the ones accepted. I just don't know if I can handle this for 3 more years. Should I let a bunch of immature kids ruin my dream, or should develope emotional broblems (more than I have already) from 4 years of bullying. These kids are the worst. On holoween last year I hadn't even planned on trick or treating, but after I gave out candy for a few hours I decided to go our for a bit. Some boys stole my candy and broke my jaw. When I got back to school people laughed at me.

[FiZzBaW]

Friend,



You are in one of those situations that there is really no answer to. I can tell you that once you get into college things are different, but High School and all grades below are filled with immature people who will do things like you are describing. It is proven that if you totally don't let their actions get to you, they will stop. thats not to say they will become your friends, but if you aren't reacting to their taunts, then they will move on to someone else that will react to their taunts. The general way to get rid of bullies is to "kill them with kindness" and to just have no negative reaction to their taunts. Its very hard to do, but if you can do it, then you will have the upper hand. Changing schools a lot can be bad or good. In general it gives you a chance to start over and make different choices, but it also means that you have to start all over developing friends, which is really hard. I'm terribly sorry that you are going through all of this. Perhaps you could seek some professional advice on the situation if you don't think what I suggested is an accomplish able goal.



-Sorry I couldn't help more. I do sympathize with you, we are here for you to vent to and try our best to help

-FiZz

[Paris In Flames]

I agree with Fizz, but there are also a lot of things that go with social status in high school.

Higene is essential. Work out, get a good body. Get a job, buy clothing that fits you and makes you look better. If you have glasses, get contacts. Style your hair. Wear cologne. Be happy and nice to people, etc etc etc.



You may be smart and people may not like you, but there are always ways to prove people wrong.



People take you seriously when you start taking yourself seriously.



Cheers,



Jenna

[Ingenuity]

I'm sorry I took so long to reply. After we had to reset our passwords and stuff, my account was acting funny, and not letting me post, and I couldn't ask for help on that forum they set up because well.. I couldn't post.

anywho, I was just gonna say that I don't necesarily agree with changing myself to fit in. The few "friends" I have now like me for being me, and if I change myself, it doesn't garantee I will make new friends, and it creates the risk of loosing the ones I have. I do have glasses, but I don't wear them very much, just when I have to see the board. I can't get contacts because the issue is a stigmatism that isn't severe enough to be corrected with contacts. and I've always had no concern for fashion. If people wanna hate me because I wear corderroys instead of jeans, and cargo shorts instead of skirts, then theirs somthing wrong with them, not me. As long as somthign is comfortable I'm not picky. I wear hand me downs from my brother, and my parents buy me stuff from this store called "scratch and dent" that gets things that other stores dont want to or can't sell for some reason.

A lot of kids who have known me a while tell me I looked better with long hair, and I have to agree with them, but I'm not sorry I cut it all off. I donated it to locks of love, and I know it made some kid very happy. Should I not have done that because it took away from my appearence or somthing.

and as for hygene. I know I am a clenly person, it's not my fault if some misinformed people think that acne is a sign of being dirty. I know I have skin problems, but there's nothing more I can do about that. I've seen a dermatologist and I'm on medication.

If people don't like me because I wasn't lucky enough to have clear skin, because I prefer academic clubs over sports teams, becasue my wardrobe isn't worth much, do I really want to be their friend. I give people respect when they give it to me, and these people haven't.