Walmart Joke

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Toolrockgirl
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Walmart Joke

Post by Toolrockgirl » Thu Dec 04, 2003 2:59 am

;) walmart Doctor



One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."



"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer'll tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."



So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart... deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits.



Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks."



That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and masturbated into the mixture for good measure.



Jack hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.



The computer prints the following:



1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.

2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.

3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.

4. Your wife is pregnant ... twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.

5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.





hehehehe im bored and i got this in an email, so i thought i would share it with everyone. ;)
weeble and bob

One of my favorites

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iHEAVENn
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Re: Walmart Joke

Post by iHEAVENn » Thu Dec 04, 2003 3:09 am

lmao funnyness :P
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lil_blonde_chic14
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Re: Walmart Joke

Post by lil_blonde_chic14 » Thu Dec 04, 2003 11:18 pm

lol my friend rosie sent me that a while back its funny i wish there was one of them in walmart lol
Fuck da world eat mo' chicken

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turn a corner your gonna break

your neck!

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Im a newfound Lesbian

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I love Tiffany!

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pm me if anyone needs to talk

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iAmAStreaker
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Re: Walmart Joke

Post by iAmAStreaker » Thu Dec 04, 2003 11:21 pm

hahaha.
<span style="font-family:Arial"i'm sveta; pleased to meet you.

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mandapanda1221
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Re: Walmart Joke

Post by mandapanda1221 » Fri Dec 05, 2003 6:11 pm

lol thats funny!!!!
-+*Manda-Panda*+-

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Hara-Kiri
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Re: Walmart Joke

Post by Hara-Kiri » Sat Dec 06, 2003 2:18 am

Ha. Ha. Ha.
To feel the wind tearing at my clothes, the elements.

The only truth left in a world of lies and hypocrisy.

The beauty of the abyss.

The anticipation, like anticipating the greatest sex, an existential foreplay.

Looking down into oblivion and voidness.

The ground far, far away as it seems from here, but in reality only a couple of seconds away.

Standing there.

Feeling eternity in a restricted world.

Feeling a decision in a prefabricated existence.

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