The Stupid Things People Say...

[flavaoftheweak]

we were reading 20,000 leagues under the sea in 6th grade, and my friend dustin got to the part where it said about the huge octopus' 80 tentacles. but he read it wrong, and being a cool 6th grader he was reading really loud... so this came out.



dustin - "the octopus has 80 TESTICLES!



we wouldnt let him live it down. we were joking about it on the last day of 8th grade *it was a GIFTED class, heh, and we all had the same teacher all 3 years*.

[Lost_Angel_of_Hope]

Originally posted by Punkishbrat+Jun 3 2003, 05:53 PM--<table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'<tr<tdQUOTE (Punkishbrat @ Jun 3 2003, 05:53 PM)</td</tr<tr<td id='QUOTE'<!--QuoteBegin-Adnama@Jun 3 2003, 12:45 PM



"Tomorrow is the day after tomorrow's yesterday's today" -friend of mine



"4 devided by 2 is 4" - my MATH teacher o.o



"The same thing isnt the same thing as not the same thing" -math teacher again o.O

Muahahaha ur math teacher sounds like a doofus



And the other ones....are confuzzling [/b][/quote]





ROFL my math teach is da same way, shes like right out of college and a blonde, bad mix, very very bad mix, but i luv her ne ways

[sugarpacket]

ok stupid things people say, huh?

i was at a party the other day, loungin w/ some friends when one of em starts to pick on me. so i pick up a stuffed dog toy and hit him with it. apparently there was something hard in it that hurt him when it hit him in the head.

*he says: are you trying to give me a fuckin hernia?!

i say: do you mean concussion? (collapse into laughter)

*he says: oh... yah, that's what i meant. (with the same anger as before: ) are you trying to give me a fuckin concussion?!

*laughter*



ok, i'm guessin you had to be there. but we're not going to let him live that one down.

[itsme]

o i got another one

friend: i swear my english teacher is illiterate

me: hm....interesting.....

[TimeMachine9906]

Matt: If your illiterate...just write us!



Me: If your deaf...give us a call!

[ashie_is_sexi]

I look good in leather.

[SirPostAlot]

some of those do make me laugh...haha...but some really, aren't the greastest...sorry, but it tis be the truth...haha

[Princesspunk86]

i got one from work.. it makes no sence

S: Why was the baby ghost scared?

M: i dont know y?

S: bc of the flea market.. WHAT?

M: did you read the right side of the wrapper?

S: yes... oh wait.. no.. theres 2 sides?!



still at work but only with coustomers (i work at games in an amusementpark)



C: what is the small prize? That little one right there?

M: ... WOW!



ok like this guy is my age

C: how many quaters can i get for 25 cents?

M: are youhitting on me?

C: yes.. but serisoly can i get 3 quarters?

M: for 25cents? NO.. ARE YOU STUPID?



keep in mind that i work in games...

M: hi can i help you?

C: yes, id take a big mac and some fries and a large coke.

M.. umm.. right



C: miss, how do you get into those houses over there? do you just open the door? an how do i know if i fit, do the celings just rise when you getinside?

M: (thinking) OMG HOW DUMB ARE YOU?! did you just listen to a thing you said



i admit i say some domb things

M: if you farted in a toilet does it still smell?

B: wow jenn!



M: if you pop a balloon and it doesnt pop how do you know if you win?

i didnt live that one down!:bag:



M: im going to get a autograph from benji madden from good charlotte, and then im gonna get it tatooed to me.

J: y do you want to do that?

M: bc hes hot!

J: so how do you think youll do that?

M: ill.. umm.. meet him

J: ok how jenn

M: i pee on myself and tell the securityguards that i have a blatter infection and that if benji would sign my peice of paper ill be all better!

YES.. I AM A BLONDE!

[fightforjay99]

what is that thing that plows the snow it just went by but i dont know the name of it. umm a plow. I said that a blonde moment and my bff wont let me live it down

[iAmAStreaker]

You didn't even spell "swear" right.

[clovers88]

On my big sis's sweet 16 her friend called and to find out how to get to our house for the party ( he's one of her friends that will smoke or sniff ne thing) .

ne way he called and asked me "do u know where u live"

i know it isn't hilarious but it is kinda funny.

[bones]

[angelbbi55]

ok, i read them ALL and i won't stop laughing til half way thru nxt week, but newayz, once, me and my friend wuz walkin 2 da bus stop and like, she wuz reading a bumper sticker and didn't see this bird just sittin on the ground (this is a good time to tell u just about ne animal'll scare the shit outa me) and she stepped on it, it turned out to be alive, it flew right near me, i start runnin and screamin down the street, l8er my friend told me that she saw it fly into a tree but when she saw me runnin and screamin like that she thought, what the hell, and did it too

u c, i don't have very good experiences w/ animals, i've been bit by a cat, a dog, a duck and a squirrel, my mommy told me not to go near the squirrel, so, it's not really funny but, it's sumthin to say

i don't know if i ever laughed so much tho, prison for ppl who commit suicide, and damn, i thought i wuz stupid jk

[angelbbi55]

umm, i wuz just sittin here and this kinda came to me cuz i had to pee really bad lol, but umm, u know how ppl w/ overactive bladders pee twice as much, and pregnant ladies pee twice as much, so, wouldn't u feel REALLY bad for all the pregnant women w/ overactive bladders? just for the record, i am not pregnant nor do i have an overactive bladder

[angelbbi55]

umm, i wuz just sittin here and this kinda came to me cuz i had to pee really bad lol, but umm, u know how ppl w/ overactive bladders pee twice as much, and pregnant ladies pee twice as much, so, wouldn't u feel REALLY bad for all the pregnant women w/ overactive bladders? just for the record, i am not pregnant nor do i have an overactive bladder, and i have a question duz this little d00d mean ur ugly as fuck

[princesspoetry]

i'm in .1 classes in school, and its a running joke that we're really not all that "gifted"...



english teacher: ok, now think of the same picture, but now in the year 2003.

**a few moments of silence**

girl in my class: wait...thats like, now.



religion teacher: ok, so what religion was the virgin mary?

same girl as before: christian?





for some reason, my homeroom at school is completely insane.



n: mike, i dont have a crush on you!

s: oh my god! she's a lesbian!



*on a friday* M: oh no! i have a religion test tomorrow!



s: i can see your belly! i can see your belly! whoa my shoes arent tied...

[Rayne]

omg all these are so funny but this one time in my computer class our teacher told us to bring our cursor to the bottom of the page and maybe this one girl couldn't do it and she like screamed IT WON"T LET ME CUM!!!!



and some guys were like i bet i could

[xXSecretlyxSinningXx]

lol...yea people do say some messed up shit..





Like...



"Do women have life insurance?" -some girl in my class



Me n my bestfriend talking

Her: I hate bumblebees...and ear wigs!

Me: Ya...me too...ya know what i think tho

Her: What?

Me: I think that bumblebees arent really bumblesbees...instead they are like airplanes for earwigs

Her: How many do you think can fit in there?

Me:.............Only one



My bestfriend when she was drunk

"You think Ryan is prettier than me...don't you?"



Me yelling at my friend cuz Im mad at her..."Shut up before I rip your braces out with my teeth!"



"If he says he wants me there by 6:00...then really he wants me there by 5:00...therfore I have to be there by 4:30 in order to make sure I'm there by 5:00...BUT if he really wants me there by 6:00 then I'd be an hour early....so I'll just show up at 7:00...no...then I'd be an hour late!!! What should I do?" -Friend

Me: Why don't you just get there at 6:00

Her: That would work...



My old friend talking to her crush

"See Bryan...we have a lot in condom!...I MEAN COMMON!"



Bio:

Sam- "So if its not breathing...its dead?"





Thats all the ones I could think of at the moment

[big_johnson]

Theres a girl that gives me hugs in the morning and whenever i hug her I ask her if she had a good day. wtf? Me tu st00pud...

[InfinityBPS]

Wow, scince me and my friends are potheads, we have tons of these things, too bad we can't always remember them



Ok, I was at some mexican food restaurant and I told my friend to just order whatever he was having, and it was like this...



R: Haha, I dipped my fry in my mashed potatos.

Me: Wha?

R: In my mashed potatos...? ya...

Me: Oh you have mashed... wait... I have mashed potatos? * looks dazed at mashed potatos*



In Bio last year(worse teacher ever):

*Teacher talking about fungus(mushrooms)*

Me: Mr. Nash, you need some fast actin tinactin!!!(realy loud)

Teacher: What?

Me: Huh?

Teacher: You want to leave this class?

Me: Kinda... what? Why?

Teacher: Shut up and sit down...

Me: I am sitting down.

Teacher: I think you want to get out of this class.

Me: Isn't that what I just said?

Teacher: Is it?

Me: Yes.

Teacher: Realy?

Me: Do you want to get out of my class?

Teacher: No, this is my class, shut your mouth before I send you out, I know you don't want that.

Me: *under my breath* Yes I do...



Walking to school after going to my frinds house:

Friend: Bitch get out of my way

Me: What? Nigga Please.

Friend: Shut up

Me: What?

Friend: Nigga.

Me: Please.

Friend: Now look what you made me do.



Me: Look a ciggaret on the floor

Anna: Where?

Me: There right in front of your face.

Anna: Where?

Me: Bitch!! Right there!!!



20 seconds later everyone is cracking up when they realized what I just said. Its funny because I realy like this girl and wouldn't say stuff like that to her.