Torn

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OrbisVita
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Torn

Post by OrbisVita » Wed Feb 08, 2006 10:30 pm

This is my predicament:



A couple years ago I dated a girl named Natasha. It was a close relationship. We eventually broke up.

Since last year I've been pretty serious with my girlfriend Katie.

For a long while we would argue often over me still occasionally hanging out with Natasha.

The last few times I hung out with Natasha reminded me of why I broke up with her, so I agree with my girlfriend with no hanging out with her.

As a useful note, I'm in college, my girlfriend, Katie, is back home (not long distance, but I live in the city and shes in the suburbs)

One of the guys she hangs out with (Larry) has been talking with her and she feels sympathy for whatever predicament he's in. She says she can relate to him somehow, and he tries to convince her to go out with him.

One night the both of them were drinking, and he kisses her.

Larry knows she is in a relationship with me and and he is still persisting that she go out with him, that he will treat her better.

Larry does bother me, having done such things, but I do not disallow or argue if Katie hangs out with him. I don't want to stop her from doing what she wants to do.

I come here because I am stressed because right now Katie went to meet Larry because he had to "talk about something with her".

I'm trying to be as fair as possible.

I don't know what to do.

I feel hypocritical taking a stance on this, seeing as how I was arguing with Katie not too long ago to hang out with my ex-girlfriend, which I understand can be painful.

I did not decide to not hang out with my ex-girlfriend because Katie asked me to, but because there was alot of problems which were beginning with me and my ex to come up again which I wished not to get back into. I've lost a degree of respect for her.



I want my girlfriend to be happy and hang out with who she wants, and I trust her to be loyal. At the same time this Larry is able to sway her emotions, he talks about how bad I am, and makes her loose trust in me, and I'm can see him talking her out of our relationship and into him with her.



What do you think? I appreciate anyone who can talk with me about this. I need it.
Every silver lining has a touch of grey.

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Stuck911
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Re: Torn

Post by Stuck911 » Thu Feb 09, 2006 2:28 pm

I really think that you should talk to Katie and tell her that you feel this way. I mean if she doesn't know that it bothers you a lot then she'll keep doing it. Tell her that you really do care for her and that you feel her friend is talking you down a lot. Hope this helped!
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