Rumors

[BlackBantie]

One of my boyfriend's friends told my friend to warn me about my boyfriend. According to his friend, he has a history of being dirty with girls.



I talked to my boyfriend about it recently. He said that his friend always looks at his Myspace and sees girls on it and thinks that he is a player. He said that he hasn't had a girlfriend since high school (he's a senior in college). I took his word for it because he treats me with the upmost respect and has never threatened me, said anything offensive to me, done anything sexual, etc.



However, I went to a party and I ran into a girl that I sort of know. She asked me if I knew that guy and I said yeah, we're dating. She gave me a concerned look and told me to be really careful. BUT, she had already had a few beers and seemed pretty buzzed. God, she got really wasted later.



I am worried because this makes another person to warn me. Honestly, I didn't even know that she knew him. But I don't know how credible she is due to the alcohol.



A couple of weeks ago, my boyfriend got really hurt because I didn't trust him due to the rumors. I asked one of his friends if he had any "girls on the side" and he found out and got depressed. Or maybe he is just a good actor.



So do I bring this up to him or let it slide?

[Stuck911]

Well if he has a history... you might not want to let it go. But if he is treating you well then maybe he has changed.

[nevermindmylife]

I think that you should be careful around him, but that you should give him the benefit of the doubt



I mean, some guys are absolutely wonderful boyfriends, but even though they are wonderful boyrfirneds, when they are single they act like completely different people when it comes to girls... and I have seen the reverse when it comes to girls being single as opposed to in a relationship.



There is a big differenence on how you treat someone that you consider dear to your heart and are in a relationship with, then how you would treat someone you would just consider doing a random hook up with.

[a4man]

ya, i wouldnt worry too much, when im single im a player, but when i have a gf im completly loyal, but i guess all guys are different

[Lena]

I say bring it up with him. Tell him everything you told us here and how it makes you feel. There will always be a background element of mistrust and doubt if you don't. Its better to talk frankly than to try and ignore it and let the doubt fester away unhealthily. At the end of the day, he should appreciate you being honest and talking to him rather than finding out later on when the situation is unfixable.



Take care,



Lena.

[Sk8r_4_LiFe]

basically - if this doesnt get settled - it will constantly be in the back of your mind

bring it up to him and tell him to be honest and if hes not honest than maybe its not worth it