Driving situation with gf

[CausticTears]

Hello,

I just need some quick advice, if possible.

My gf lives about 25 minutes away and she lives on her own (I live with my mom so I cant have her sleep over). I am always driving her place to just hang out for the day or sometimes sleep over. She hardly drives to where I live. She's driving down tonight because she is invited to my friend's party. But other than that, she doesn't drive down here to hang out.



I asked her to drive me home with her tonight and drive me back down tomorrow or something. She's done this a few times and I felt great about it. I felt like she was giving some effort and caring about the fact I always drove down there. She refused to this time and said it was a waste of time and gas. She also said that if she was able to sleep over, she'd be down here more often. *shrugs*



Do I stand my ground and not drive down there til she drives me? Or agree with her? It's not like I always ask for this, I just think it should occur sometimes. It doesn't seem fair to me

[Barbies are Evil]

if it doesn't seem fair to you, then you guys should talk about it.......a relationship is a two way street.

[Michie]

I do not know the details of your situation completely - does she have her own car? Do you? Who's paying for gas? - But, in my opinion, if you and her want to spend time with eachother, it would be fair if you both compromise and come to an agreement as to who comes to visit whom and how.



You shouldn't have to be driving to her all the time. And she shouldn't have to be driving you there and back all the time (for her to drive to pick you up, take you to her house, then drop you off at home and then go to her house again is 4 trips). Have it so that, if she's the one driving all the time, you help cover her gas expenses.



It is also an issue of...is the time you spend together solely sleep overs? How about just going out on a date in your area? Do you have to sleep over at her house afterwards? Maybe the 4-way trip is exhausting for her. Some nights, just have to make a 2-way trip.



That's just my opinion anyway. Hope this helped.

[Spitfire]

If it feels unfair to you, maybe you guys can even it out in other ways...Like maybe you drive...and she buys you dinner once in a while? If you don't mind doing it and it's not an actual problem, then personally I would just let it fly, as long as you don't feel like you're being taken advantage of

[Kit]

Just from what you've said - I would say that you need to have a serious talk. Tell her what you told us. You sholdn't be the one to always provide everything. She needs to help you too. It shouldn't be a waste of time or gas if she gets to spendtime ith you - wouldn't you think? but - if you think about it - she'd have to drive down there pick you up, drive back down there to drop you off and driv herself back - It's takes moe for her to do that than for you to drive up there yourself and i think that's where she is coming from. Maybe she can drive down in the morning, spend the whole day with you and go back at night. Maybe try something like that?