The Next Level?

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rockerchick
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The Next Level?

Post by rockerchick »

ok, well i've been dating this one guy for almost 3 months now...and i honestly think i'm in love, and that he's in love with me! It's crazy how insane we are about each other...but, besides making out, we haven't done anything "intimate". So i was wondering....how can we get to the next level? not like sex or anything, but at least hand jobs...or oral. My bf's very shy, and always worried about doing something wrong (even though he's been in other relationships before, and I haven't) I don't think he's ever done anything more than making out...at least not that i know of. And, i'm not even sure i want to move on...I'm extremely happy just being in the same room as him for more than 5 minutes...but, i can tell he's thinking about it...and I think that if he initiated it, I'd just go with it (ex: our first kiss night, was also our first make out night) but, I'm just not sure how i can get him to move on...any ideas?
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JazzIsLove
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by JazzIsLove »

oooh I know exactly how you feel!!! I had this exact same problem.. except my guy had had sex many times before w/ one chick. but well he didn't iniated stuff w/ her so he wasn't used to that..and we were REALLY slow taking off on anything cuz he didn't iniated.. and in the end, i went out with him 4 times, each for at least 3 months, and i never did anything more than kiss him.. altho he did stuff to me. but then i dated another guy twice, who i had oral with.. both gave and received.. cuz he initiated it. so i know what u mean by the initation thing.. i dunno what to tell u..cuz well i suck at it too..

towards the end of our last relationship however, after like 3 months, i started getting more comfortable and at least was more free to do little things like jus kiss him first, etc. so things will come with time.. just slower for you than some others. Either that or can you just talk to him about it? cuz i mean that's easier than actually doing stuff.. and maybe he can take the initaitive..

that stuff will just come with time though, :)
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skaterGuy15
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by skaterGuy15 »

He just doesn't want to offend you. Tell him you want to give him one (or imply it in some subtle way if you're too shy to say it straight out), just let him know you're up for it. That's what I did and it worked out fine.
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2Blunt
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by 2Blunt »

Usually most girls give off natural signs that they want to move on, (thought lots of people don't seem to notice them). But the best way to do it without fully out being like, hey, finger me, would be to just take his hand while you're making out, and lead it down onto yourself. If he just leaves it there, or moves it away, then put it back down there, and maybe rub his fingers against it a bit. Basically, just show him what you want by doing it with his hand.
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SexyLittleDoll
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by SexyLittleDoll »

If you guys have never said about it before then I think that you need to talk about it before you do anything. Sex even oral sex in my opinion is something that if ur not comfortable talking about u shouldn't do. So just casually bring it up and see what he says.
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rockerchick
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by rockerchick »

seriously??? You actually have conversations about it before you do it? I thought that would make it extremely weird...that's even what my friend told me. I said "i think that he's thinking about it...but he hasn't said anything" and she said "Well duh! You guys aren't guna have a huge conversation about it...it'll just happen"

So...should i actually ask him about it? or just do the subtle signs like other people said?
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Love2Laugh08
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by Love2Laugh08 »

Hey well I think give him signs first and if that doesnt work then you should talk to about it. Maybe when you guys are making out like touch him more and just show him you want to go to the next level, if he gets the idea you want sex just say you dont feel right doing it then you just want to do other things ( like you said oral sex ) good luck! :)
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by 5a5 »

i'd just ask him, i mean if u guys cant even talk about it, how do u think u'll be able to do anything? u have to be comfortable with each other, .., as for doing more, well idk maybe when u guys are making out u can do a little touching and exploring see how he reacts.., but yeah usually the guy makes the first move so somehow let him know it's ok
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skaterGuy15
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by skaterGuy15 »

Well, like Mandy said. If you're not comfortable talking about it then don't do it, you have to be mature about this stuff.
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Michie
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Re: The Next Level?

Post by Michie »

I think it's important to talk toyour guy about it. As love_in_a_box said, if you can't talk about it, don't do it.



The best thing is to say... I want to take things to another level...

and then while you're making out, show him what you want to do.



Take it slowly, so that you are both comfortable with the pace, and in the end it'll be worth it :D
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