How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Moderator: Sex & Relationships Moderators
- Sam!
- Veteran
- Posts: 3036
- Joined: Thu Feb 13, 2003 2:06 pm
- Contact:
How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
I know this is dumb, and some stereotypes will show up here, but please just help me out.
There is this boy at school I like, and I think he likes me too. My friend with great gaydar says it's possible he's gay or bi, and since I'm closeted, I can't exactly tell him I am and ask if he is....
What are some signs? Help....
There is this boy at school I like, and I think he likes me too. My friend with great gaydar says it's possible he's gay or bi, and since I'm closeted, I can't exactly tell him I am and ask if he is....
What are some signs? Help....
-Sam!
- immeyupthatsalll
- Loyal
- Posts: 162
- Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2003 9:29 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
i just went through the exact same thing with my boyfriend. the ONLY way to do this is to get to know him. befriend him and see what kind of a person he is. if you feel you can trust him, then come out to him. trust a relationship's base anyway right? be honest, thats all i can say. i know its hard, but *I* find that to be the only way..
Match in the gas tank. Boom Boom!
- Sam!
- Veteran
- Posts: 3036
- Joined: Thu Feb 13, 2003 2:06 pm
- Contact:
- SirPostAlot
- Veteran
- Posts: 8532
- Joined: Sat May 10, 2003 7:28 pm
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
I am in the same situation...I am very shy toward guys, but i want to know who is a closeted gay and who is straight...ahm...i need help too, so don't feel bad chocolate...i don't know what to do either
- Paris In Flames
- Veteran
- Posts: 5387
- Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2003 12:52 am
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Hmmm...I'm a lesbian, but I pretty much know if somebody is gay or not because of my incredible gaydar.
Signs...lets see here. The main thing is body language. Try to see how the guy stands next to other guys, whether he is flambuoyant or not...
Ummm...look if they have like a rainbow on their backpack or anything like. I've heard that left cartiledge peircing on guys means that theyre gay. I have two holes in my left ear, one in my right, and the top hole on the right ear is a rainbow. So, yeah, that's mainly the only flambuoyancy I show.
Umm..I'm not quite sure how to help you on signs, so I'd do it the old fashioned way. Go and talk to him. Just walk up, start up a conversation, and get to know em. That's what I do..
Cheers,
Jenna
Signs...lets see here. The main thing is body language. Try to see how the guy stands next to other guys, whether he is flambuoyant or not...
Ummm...look if they have like a rainbow on their backpack or anything like. I've heard that left cartiledge peircing on guys means that theyre gay. I have two holes in my left ear, one in my right, and the top hole on the right ear is a rainbow. So, yeah, that's mainly the only flambuoyancy I show.
Umm..I'm not quite sure how to help you on signs, so I'd do it the old fashioned way. Go and talk to him. Just walk up, start up a conversation, and get to know em. That's what I do..
Cheers,
Jenna
xMOSHx xHELLA HARDCOREx xBREAKDOWNx
The tragedy is the ignorance behind the clean casket
On the outside, they look so good
They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...
The tragedy is the ignorance behind the clean casket
On the outside, they look so good
They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...
- oneforthemoney
- Veteran
- Posts: 1165
- Joined: Mon Dec 16, 2002 2:06 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Alright...
I agree that you need to become his friend first to actually ask him or hint to him that you think he's gay...or something down the line of that.
Remember, if you become his friend he'll obviously learn to trust you and if he is gay, he'd more likely think "hey, well here's a friend I can tell"... As soon as I found out one of my friends were bi, I immediately told them that I was too - just because I can relate to how they feel. Well if he is gay I know he'd be willing to share it if he have you as a friend and if you'd support him... yet again, that's only if he'd be willing to share as much cause I know some guys can really shut their feelings out to the world...
just give it time..and try to be his friend
~one~
I agree that you need to become his friend first to actually ask him or hint to him that you think he's gay...or something down the line of that.
Remember, if you become his friend he'll obviously learn to trust you and if he is gay, he'd more likely think "hey, well here's a friend I can tell"... As soon as I found out one of my friends were bi, I immediately told them that I was too - just because I can relate to how they feel. Well if he is gay I know he'd be willing to share it if he have you as a friend and if you'd support him... yet again, that's only if he'd be willing to share as much cause I know some guys can really shut their feelings out to the world...
just give it time..and try to be his friend
~one~
- Saren
- Veteran
- Posts: 7463
- Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2003 12:48 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
See if you can get courage to befriend him. Somewhere along the way, this bond can be formed. One that can lead to an answer that you thought maybe was true. I don't know if I really believe in gaydar. Everyone has their own sense of acting different. They're unique.
But sure. Talking to this guy couldn't hurt. It's one of your top choices to go by, especially to see if you can give time to get trust...
But sure. Talking to this guy couldn't hurt. It's one of your top choices to go by, especially to see if you can give time to get trust...
- Sam!
- Veteran
- Posts: 3036
- Joined: Thu Feb 13, 2003 2:06 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Thanks guys, here's what the update is:
I talked to him on the phone, we agreed to study latin together etc. Then, I told him I have a site, and he asked about it. I said I can't send you to it b/c it has personal secrets about me. Then he said he wanted to see it, so I finally let him, because after talking for two hours, I felt I could trust him. My trust was well placed. Anyway, he knows I'm bi, and even though I didn't tell him I liked him that way, or that I think he is too, he immediately started saying that he's not. And through the rest of our conversation, he kept re-iterating that. Do you think he's in denial about his sexuality? Or do you think he's actually straight?
I talked to him on the phone, we agreed to study latin together etc. Then, I told him I have a site, and he asked about it. I said I can't send you to it b/c it has personal secrets about me. Then he said he wanted to see it, so I finally let him, because after talking for two hours, I felt I could trust him. My trust was well placed. Anyway, he knows I'm bi, and even though I didn't tell him I liked him that way, or that I think he is too, he immediately started saying that he's not. And through the rest of our conversation, he kept re-iterating that. Do you think he's in denial about his sexuality? Or do you think he's actually straight?
-Sam!
- immeyupthatsalll
- Loyal
- Posts: 162
- Joined: Mon Sep 22, 2003 9:29 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
ACK **falls back** two hours isnt enough to form a bond. **sigh** well anyway, i dont know, maybe he isnt, you said he was bookwormish, so maybe hes just geeky ^^;;;;; i dont know. just...dont hit on him. if hes not gay then thats really irritating. be his frend, lol.
Match in the gas tank. Boom Boom!
- Paris In Flames
- Veteran
- Posts: 5387
- Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2003 12:52 am
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Hey,
In my experience, he kept on telling you he wasn't gay/bi because he probably got the idea that you liked him. I'll bet a million bucks that he's telling the truth. Don't hit on him, or he might freak out.
Try to continue to talk to him, because I agree with immeyepthatsall.... two hours isn't enough to bond.
Cheers,
Jenna
In my experience, he kept on telling you he wasn't gay/bi because he probably got the idea that you liked him. I'll bet a million bucks that he's telling the truth. Don't hit on him, or he might freak out.
Try to continue to talk to him, because I agree with immeyepthatsall.... two hours isn't enough to bond.
Cheers,
Jenna
xMOSHx xHELLA HARDCOREx xBREAKDOWNx
The tragedy is the ignorance behind the clean casket
On the outside, they look so good
They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...
The tragedy is the ignorance behind the clean casket
On the outside, they look so good
They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...
- Sam!
- Veteran
- Posts: 3036
- Joined: Thu Feb 13, 2003 2:06 pm
- Contact:
- Paris In Flames
- Veteran
- Posts: 5387
- Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2003 12:52 am
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Hey,
Sorry, I screwed up my wording. I meant to say that if he keeps on saying that he isn't gay/bi, then he probably isn't...
Sorry,
Cheers,
Jenna
Sorry, I screwed up my wording. I meant to say that if he keeps on saying that he isn't gay/bi, then he probably isn't...
Sorry,
Cheers,
Jenna
xMOSHx xHELLA HARDCOREx xBREAKDOWNx
The tragedy is the ignorance behind the clean casket
On the outside, they look so good
They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...
The tragedy is the ignorance behind the clean casket
On the outside, they look so good
They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...
- Saren
- Veteran
- Posts: 7463
- Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2003 12:48 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Well he's probably stressing for you to not hit on him. But lots of people can give hints that way. Nobody exactly knows with some people. No, two hours AREN'T enough really, but maybe he'll trust you enough for a secret that could be what you didn't expect it was. Some people are just unpredictable. We don't see what's in them, nor their future, but we do see their true selves. If that made sense
- Sam!
- Veteran
- Posts: 3036
- Joined: Thu Feb 13, 2003 2:06 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Hmmmm... while I don't like the answers, they could be right. Thanks for helping.
-Sam!
- Mike8
- Loyal
- Posts: 53
- Joined: Sun Oct 05, 2003 6:56 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Sometimes it can be that they don't trust you enough. In 2 hours I would never tell someone that I'm gay, well... maybe; but not everyone feels the same way. Who knows, while you continue to be his friend, he might get to a point to where he could tell you that he is bi/gay, but don't go on in a friendship under the pretense of making him tell you he is, because if he really isn't, then you will have cheated both his and your emotions.
I'm gay and proud of it, Thank you very much!
-"I'm not here to please people, I am who I am and I won't change for anybody" - Me
-"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are" - Kurt Cobain
-"If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right" - Unknown
FIGHT HOMOPHOBIA!!!
-"I'm not here to please people, I am who I am and I won't change for anybody" - Me
-"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are" - Kurt Cobain
-"If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right" - Unknown
FIGHT HOMOPHOBIA!!!
- oneforthemoney
- Veteran
- Posts: 1165
- Joined: Mon Dec 16, 2002 2:06 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Originally posted by Chocolat Moi@Oct 3 2003, 11:56 AM
Thanks guys, here's what the update is:
Then he said he wanted to see it, so I finally let him, because after talking for two hours
K.. wow, two guys talking for THAT long? ...mmm, I wonder. I agree with Mike... maybe he needs time , maybe he will come out to you later if he is gay or not...
just give it time
~one~
- Mike8
- Loyal
- Posts: 53
- Joined: Sun Oct 05, 2003 6:56 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Originally posted by sarcasticwraith@Oct 2 2003, 05:40 PM
Hmmm...I'm a lesbian, but I pretty much know if somebody is gay or not because of my incredible gaydar.
Jenna, you're a trip! I really didn't even think that a gay-dar existed until I just started noticing people. It was like a light being switched on, I could just.. tell.
I'm gay and proud of it, Thank you very much!
-"I'm not here to please people, I am who I am and I won't change for anybody" - Me
-"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are" - Kurt Cobain
-"If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right" - Unknown
FIGHT HOMOPHOBIA!!!
-"I'm not here to please people, I am who I am and I won't change for anybody" - Me
-"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are" - Kurt Cobain
-"If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right" - Unknown
FIGHT HOMOPHOBIA!!!
- TimeMachine9906
- Loyal
- Posts: 714
- Joined: Mon Apr 21, 2003 10:56 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
....wtf is closeted? Im not trying to be mean, and I think that gaydar doesnt exist lol. And.........
[quote] Hmmm...I'm a lesbian, [quote]
*makes phone gesture with hand* give me a call sarcasticwrath! lol jp.
[quote] Hmmm...I'm a lesbian, [quote]
*makes phone gesture with hand* give me a call sarcasticwrath! lol jp.
So Let's Find A Bar
So Dark We Forget Who We Are
And All The Scars From The
Nevers And Maybes Die
So Dark We Forget Who We Are
And All The Scars From The
Nevers And Maybes Die
- Sam!
- Veteran
- Posts: 3036
- Joined: Thu Feb 13, 2003 2:06 pm
- Contact:
Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?
Closeted means "in the closet" "hidden about sexuality" read my article I wrote somewhere in here... lol
And it turns out he was straight. Darn it!
And it turns out he was straight. Darn it!
-Sam!