How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

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Sam!
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How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Sam! »

I know this is dumb, and some stereotypes will show up here, but please just help me out.



There is this boy at school I like, and I think he likes me too. My friend with great gaydar says it's possible he's gay or bi, and since I'm closeted, I can't exactly tell him I am and ask if he is....



What are some signs? Help....
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immeyupthatsalll
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by immeyupthatsalll »

i just went through the exact same thing with my boyfriend. the ONLY way to do this is to get to know him. befriend him and see what kind of a person he is. if you feel you can trust him, then come out to him. trust a relationship's base anyway right? be honest, thats all i can say. i know its hard, but *I* find that to be the only way..
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Sam!
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Sam! »

But I'm REALLY scared... I don't know.....
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by SirPostAlot »

I am in the same situation...I am very shy toward guys, but i want to know who is a closeted gay and who is straight...ahm...i need help too, so don't feel bad chocolate...i don't know what to do either
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Paris In Flames
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Paris In Flames »

Hmmm...I'm a lesbian, but I pretty much know if somebody is gay or not because of my incredible gaydar.



Signs...lets see here. The main thing is body language. Try to see how the guy stands next to other guys, whether he is flambuoyant or not...



Ummm...look if they have like a rainbow on their backpack or anything like. I've heard that left cartiledge peircing on guys means that theyre gay. I have two holes in my left ear, one in my right, and the top hole on the right ear is a rainbow. So, yeah, that's mainly the only flambuoyancy I show.



Umm..I'm not quite sure how to help you on signs, so I'd do it the old fashioned way. Go and talk to him. Just walk up, start up a conversation, and get to know em. That's what I do..



Cheers,



Jenna
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by oneforthemoney »

Alright...



I agree that you need to become his friend first to actually ask him or hint to him that you think he's gay...or something down the line of that.



Remember, if you become his friend he'll obviously learn to trust you and if he is gay, he'd more likely think "hey, well here's a friend I can tell"... As soon as I found out one of my friends were bi, I immediately told them that I was too - just because I can relate to how they feel. Well if he is gay I know he'd be willing to share it if he have you as a friend and if you'd support him... yet again, that's only if he'd be willing to share as much cause I know some guys can really shut their feelings out to the world...



just give it time..and try to be his friend



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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Saren »

See if you can get courage to befriend him. Somewhere along the way, this bond can be formed. One that can lead to an answer that you thought maybe was true. I don't know if I really believe in gaydar. Everyone has their own sense of acting different. They're unique.



But sure. Talking to this guy couldn't hurt. It's one of your top choices to go by, especially to see if you can give time to get trust... :)
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Sam! »

Thanks guys, here's what the update is:



I talked to him on the phone, we agreed to study latin together etc. Then, I told him I have a site, and he asked about it. I said I can't send you to it b/c it has personal secrets about me. Then he said he wanted to see it, so I finally let him, because after talking for two hours, I felt I could trust him. My trust was well placed. Anyway, he knows I'm bi, and even though I didn't tell him I liked him that way, or that I think he is too, he immediately started saying that he's not. And through the rest of our conversation, he kept re-iterating that. Do you think he's in denial about his sexuality? Or do you think he's actually straight?
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immeyupthatsalll
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by immeyupthatsalll »

ACK **falls back** two hours isnt enough to form a bond. **sigh** well anyway, i dont know, maybe he isnt, you said he was bookwormish, so maybe hes just geeky ^^;;;;; i dont know. just...dont hit on him. if hes not gay then thats really irritating. be his frend, lol.
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Paris In Flames
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Paris In Flames »

Hey,



In my experience, he kept on telling you he wasn't gay/bi because he probably got the idea that you liked him. I'll bet a million bucks that he's telling the truth. Don't hit on him, or he might freak out.



Try to continue to talk to him, because I agree with immeyepthatsall.... two hours isn't enough to bond.



Cheers,



Jenna
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Sam!
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Sam! »

Um, he said he wasn't gay... but thanks for trying?
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Paris In Flames »

Hey,



Sorry, I screwed up my wording. I meant to say that if he keeps on saying that he isn't gay/bi, then he probably isn't...



Sorry,

Cheers,



Jenna
xMOSHx xHELLA HARDCOREx xBREAKDOWNx



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On the outside, they look so good

They're walking to Wallstreet in a straightjacket...
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Saren
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Saren »

Well he's probably stressing for you to not hit on him. But lots of people can give hints that way. Nobody exactly knows with some people. No, two hours AREN'T enough really, but maybe he'll trust you enough for a secret that could be what you didn't expect it was. Some people are just unpredictable. We don't see what's in them, nor their future, but we do see their true selves. If that made sense :huh:
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Sam!
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Sam! »

Hmmmm... while I don't like the answers, they could be right. Thanks for helping.
-Sam!
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Mike8 »

Sometimes it can be that they don't trust you enough. In 2 hours I would never tell someone that I'm gay, well... maybe; but not everyone feels the same way. Who knows, while you continue to be his friend, he might get to a point to where he could tell you that he is bi/gay, but don't go on in a friendship under the pretense of making him tell you he is, because if he really isn't, then you will have cheated both his and your emotions.
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by oneforthemoney »

Originally posted by Chocolat Moi@Oct 3 2003, 11:56 AM

Thanks guys, here's what the update is:

Then he said he wanted to see it, so I finally let him, because after talking for two hours


K.. wow, two guys talking for THAT long? ...mmm, I wonder. I agree with Mike... maybe he needs time , maybe he will come out to you later if he is gay or not...



just give it time



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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Mike8 »

Originally posted by sarcasticwraith@Oct 2 2003, 05:40 PM

Hmmm...I'm a lesbian, but I pretty much know if somebody is gay or not because of my incredible gaydar.


:lol: Jenna, you're a trip! I really didn't even think that a gay-dar existed until I just started noticing people. It was like a light being switched on, I could just.. tell.
I'm gay and proud of it, Thank you very much!



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-"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are" - Kurt Cobain

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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by TimeMachine9906 »

....wtf is closeted? Im not trying to be mean, and I think that gaydar doesnt exist lol. And.........



[quote] Hmmm...I'm a lesbian, [quote]



*makes phone gesture with hand* give me a call sarcasticwrath! lol jp.
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Sam!
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Re: How Do You Tell If Someone Is Gay?

Post by Sam! »

Closeted means "in the closet" "hidden about sexuality" read my article I wrote somewhere in here... lol



And it turns out he was straight. Darn it!
-Sam!
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