I admit, I have always been curious as to what it would be like with someone of the same sex. Only one other person knows this, and hes my ex boyfriend who I no longer speek to. But thats not the problem. Recently I have been hanging out with my best friend ALOT more then usual. But lately... I've realized I'm becoming attracted to her. Like, yesterday I slept over her dorm and we shared a bed, but all I wanted to do was roll over and do stuff to her. That never happened before.
I'm to scared to tell anyone, and I could never tell her. She has no problem with this stuff, but it might bother her a little and affect our friendship, which would be really bad.
But one of my other problems is... I don't know if I'm attracted to her because I might be bi, or if its just because I really just want to try experamenting with a girl. And I feel shitty saying this, but I dont what to have a relationship, I just want to try out sex and nothing more.
So thats my problem, and its confusing the hell out of me. What do you guys think?
So... I realize I have a problem.
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- UmeMakoto
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So... I realize I have a problem.
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- InnocenceLost57
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Re: So... I realize I have a problem.
Hey there!
First off - don't worry too much about the attraction; it's actually pretty normal. Lots of girls our age (and even some guys!) wonder about what it wouldl be like to try things with people of the same sex. Lots of times, the people they wonder about are friends, because you're already comfortable with the person in question.
From what it sounds like with you, it could be nothing more than just a desire for something new or out of curiosity. But - have you ever been attracted to girls before? This could be either, but honestly, don't be so quick to label yourself.
You say she has no problem with this stuff - but you think it might bother her to have it affect her personally? that's always a concern. Especially if you don't know how she feels towards you, as in just friends or something more. Is she bi/gay, or do you think she's straight?
If you think it might ruin your relationship, then I wouldn't say anything until you can scope out her feelings a bit more. However, I think talking to her about it might help if you don't think she would flip out. And as for the just sex thing - be careful with that, because the whole "friends with benifits" thing can get sticky if anything ever DOES end up happening. But you never know where things can go. Maybe she could be into just trying things out as well.
I know it's tough, but you'll never know unless you try to find out her feelings as well. So start paying more attention to how she acts in certain situations, maybe try to bring up something related to the topic, anything to find out her feelings. I hope everything goes well if you do end up trying to talk to her.
First off - don't worry too much about the attraction; it's actually pretty normal. Lots of girls our age (and even some guys!) wonder about what it wouldl be like to try things with people of the same sex. Lots of times, the people they wonder about are friends, because you're already comfortable with the person in question.
From what it sounds like with you, it could be nothing more than just a desire for something new or out of curiosity. But - have you ever been attracted to girls before? This could be either, but honestly, don't be so quick to label yourself.
You say she has no problem with this stuff - but you think it might bother her to have it affect her personally? that's always a concern. Especially if you don't know how she feels towards you, as in just friends or something more. Is she bi/gay, or do you think she's straight?
If you think it might ruin your relationship, then I wouldn't say anything until you can scope out her feelings a bit more. However, I think talking to her about it might help if you don't think she would flip out. And as for the just sex thing - be careful with that, because the whole "friends with benifits" thing can get sticky if anything ever DOES end up happening. But you never know where things can go. Maybe she could be into just trying things out as well.
I know it's tough, but you'll never know unless you try to find out her feelings as well. So start paying more attention to how she acts in certain situations, maybe try to bring up something related to the topic, anything to find out her feelings. I hope everything goes well if you do end up trying to talk to her.
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The next just sky
Reach up
And let's propose a toast
To the thing that hurts you most
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(O.o) Copy bunny into your signature to help
( <) him achieve world domination
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- UmeMakoto
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Re: So... I realize I have a problem.
I have looked at girls yes, but in a purely sexual way. I doubt I could ever have a 'relationship' with someone of the same gender. Thats the only reason why I used Bi, me looking at women have been going on for a wile.
Yes, I know for a fact she'd be bothered if it affected her personally. Shes friends with some gay people, so thats not the problem. But a wile ago we were joking around and I guess i took it a step to far (Which wasn't far at all really) and she got kind of awkward. Alot of people used to think she was a lesbian because she never really had a boyfriend, and I know it made her upset because she claims shes not.
As for FWB, don't worry, i'm quite aware how sitcky those can get. But for some reason, even though I stated above I wouldn't want a relationship with a girl, my friend is probably the only girl I would ever want to be in a relationship with.
Yes, I know for a fact she'd be bothered if it affected her personally. Shes friends with some gay people, so thats not the problem. But a wile ago we were joking around and I guess i took it a step to far (Which wasn't far at all really) and she got kind of awkward. Alot of people used to think she was a lesbian because she never really had a boyfriend, and I know it made her upset because she claims shes not.
As for FWB, don't worry, i'm quite aware how sitcky those can get. But for some reason, even though I stated above I wouldn't want a relationship with a girl, my friend is probably the only girl I would ever want to be in a relationship with.
"Music is one of the keys to the laws of the Universe."- Mists of Avalon.
- UmeMakoto
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Re: So... I realize I have a problem.
Ok well... I have an update on the situation.
Since I have posted this me and my friend have been pratically living together. I am having problems with my roommates so I've been sleeping over her dorm atleast 4 nights a week.
Well... needless to say I know for a fact now that I am attracted to her. I want her, and I want to be with her and all that stuff. I'm having so much trouble not just grabbing her and holding her. And thats a major problem... because I don't think she would let me. I've been 'joking' around with her alot the past few weeks, and sometimes she jokes back or gets freaked out. Hell, I even got her to bite my neck. (Though now she refuses to do it anymore.)
So I have no idea what to do. If this was just some other guy I could handle it... but i'm compleatly lost right now...
Since I have posted this me and my friend have been pratically living together. I am having problems with my roommates so I've been sleeping over her dorm atleast 4 nights a week.
Well... needless to say I know for a fact now that I am attracted to her. I want her, and I want to be with her and all that stuff. I'm having so much trouble not just grabbing her and holding her. And thats a major problem... because I don't think she would let me. I've been 'joking' around with her alot the past few weeks, and sometimes she jokes back or gets freaked out. Hell, I even got her to bite my neck. (Though now she refuses to do it anymore.)
So I have no idea what to do. If this was just some other guy I could handle it... but i'm compleatly lost right now...
"Music is one of the keys to the laws of the Universe."- Mists of Avalon.