Confusing Love Triangle!

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Scribblur
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Confusing Love Triangle!

Post by Scribblur »

Right, here goes.

There is this boy at school (let's call him T), who I've started to like. He's been showing a few signs of liking me too, but I can't tell as they're very vague and might not be anything. If I could, I would get friendlier with him and ask him out.

There are two main barriers in the situation. One is one of my best friends. Let's call her C. The other is school cliques.

C started to like T about a year ago, and ever since then she's been obsessing over him. In February/March time, she asked him out and got rejected (in a nice way). C hasn't got over him. Recently, I told her I'd developed feelings for T too. She got annoyed, as she does, and wouldn't talk to me for a little while. We sorted it out, though, but only temporarily.

Now, last week, we were on holiday in France with school. Whilst we were there, my likings for T grew to a full-blown crush. He kept looking at me and smiling and even made some attempt at conversation (remember, this is a teenage boy we're talking about). When I almost broke my nose in the assault course, he was the only person from another group to come over and ask me if I was alright with blood all over my face. On the journey home, we talked a bit in a queue at a shop. He smiled at me and looked me in the eyes a lot, and my confidence soared to new heights (even though he was probably just being friendly, but still, it's a sign). I practically skipped out the shop, and bumped into C.

C was seething. She'd seen what had happened and thought we were flirting! It didn't help that I'd bragged just a teensy weensy bit by saying, 'At least he made the effort to speak to me!' (Because he never talked to her).

Ever since we got home, it's been as awkward as hell between me and C. She has got it into her head that he fancies me too (hard to say at this point). We met up on Saturday to discuss things, and she said she doesn't mind if I go out with him and I shouldn't consider her if he asks me out. I thought that it had all worked out, but no.

At school yesterday, it was even worse. The timetables changed, and I'm in a lot of classes with T but C isn't. I made a jokey comment today, and she said 'You've done enough,' meaning that I've somehow stolen her man (pffft!) away from her. Hey, it's not my fault if he likes me and not her! I think that she needs to grow up, because things like this happen in life, and I don't want to ruin out friendship. On the other hand, I really like T and want to get to know him. I definitely wouldn't sacrifice my friends for some boy, but... I think she has to move on.



The other obstacle? School cliques. Ah yes. Well, at our school, me and my friends are unpopular. We're not popular, basically. Why? Because we sit somewhere different at lunch and break.

Oh yes.

We sit in a secluded corner of the hall, on the floor, whereas everyone else sits on uncomfortable benches in the main area of it, or in the cafeteria. We have earned the fabulous (ha!) nickname of 'The Corner Club', which is used in spite against us.

Boy 1: Oh, who's that girl? She looks nice.

Boy 2: She's in the corner club.

Boy 1: Eww.

And no, moving out wouldn't change that. We don't even call ourselves the corner club! Also, quite a lot of people think we're lesbians, just because most of us have never had a boyfriend (also due to being unpopular - vicious circle, right?).

I know, it's retarded. But if T did like me, he wouldn't want to go out with me in fear of losing his reputation! He's popular, funny and is friends with everyone (everyone means everyone; he does hang out with the wrong crowd at times). Basically, he's way out of my league.





Putting all of this into consideration, I have no idea whether he likes me or not! There have been so many mixed messages that I'm confused out of my mind.



If anyone has any advice whatsoever, please comment or something! Just contact me in whatever way you can. Please, I'm getting kinda desperate.



Thanks.



P.S. Everyone mentioned is 13 or 14 years old.



Whew, sorry that was long. Probably won't get any replies, because no-one can be bothered reading all that! But if you can, please help. My friend C has trouble listening when you need to tell her something important and is likely to lose her temper. Keep that in mind.
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OverDrive
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Re: Confusing Love Triangle!

Post by OverDrive »

With regards to problem A) with you, T, & C, put yourself in C's shoes, and try and feel what she feels. Young teens often can't get over what is evidently a very trivial thing like this. You have to decide whether C is just "saying" it would be alright, or if the friendship would end if you did go out with T. You also need to consider if her friendship is worth the risk of losing it. From a 3rd party perspective, C does need to learn to accept rejection and move on, however it's not that easy sometimes and this can cloud her judgement.



With respect to the Cliques, consider best senario for a second, he decides to date you and him being popular, raises your status, and possibly all the other "corner club" girls. Consider worst senario - you don't ask, he doesn't ask, you go about your business and he goes about his. Consider what may happen if you ask him if he likes you and then ask him out - he says yes, or he says no. Either way, you find a definitive answer and know for sure. It's always cute and funny to hear a girl go "Do you like me? I mean like me, like me?" It always brings a smile to my face. (Just thought I'd stick that in there, lol) Of course don't do that until you deal with problem A above.
Last edited by OverDrive on Tue Jun 08, 2010 9:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Sickofbeingbitchedabout
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Re: Confusing Love Triangle!

Post by Sickofbeingbitchedabout »

Ughh.. I'm 14 as well and I always get in situations like this <img src='http://www.helpingteens.org/groups/publ ... tongue.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':P' /> If you go out with him, she can't be mad, she has no right to be, It's not like you going out with him means he was gonna go out with her and you're the only obstacle. Guys make great friends, chat with him and be friendly, I'm always being told by my girl friends that i must be in love with any friends I have who are guys, which isn't true (except in one case and apparently he likes me to <img src='http://www.helpingteens.org/groups/publ ... iggrin.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':D' />) but I know that they're good guys before I would want to go out with them! It's a win/win :]
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