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Posted: Tue Sep 27, 2011 3:52 pm
So this is long. I fell in love with this boy, my best friend (lets call him C) in january. In february, my sister and best friend, both convinced me to tell him. To start with nothing much happened. But then in march i went out with someone else(we'll call him J), still in love with C but I went out with J to try and get over C. My best friend used to sit next to him in some of their lessons and she told him i'd moved on. That was the day she realised he liked me. As i was going out with J, C was always asking where he was when he wasn't with me. After 2weeks I dumped J because i realised i'd hurt him in the end and i still wasn't over C. After that, things with C went from good to better. We started acting like we were going out. We had silly little arguments about who loved who more. He was my world. He stopped me from committing suicide a number of times. And as the days went by i was falling harder and harder in love. No one had ever made me feel as special as he did, or as loved as he did, or made me cry so much from the sweet things he said and did. The only thing was that he would never actually go out with me. His reasons were because he's not good enough for me. This was the one thing that always hurt me about him. Because i have such low self confidence, that it made me think i was he one that wasn't good enough. At the end of last year, we got even closer, so close he kissed me, only on the cheek, but that still counts. Right? Then i went on holiday and everything changed. We were constantly inboxing each other and saying "i love you" and "i miss you" but then i suddenly started getting really scary feelings. Ones which made me think i was loosing him. When i got back, he asked me if i still liked him. I told him the truth, that i did, and asked him, to which he also said he did. But something still felt wrong. And then a few days later he told me he'd moved on during the summer while i was away. This has hurt me so much. And to start with he wouldn't even talk to me, which hurt more. But then a few days later he told me he'd lied and had never moved on. The only reason was because we will never go out and it's unfair the way he had been treating me. Slowly our friendshup is going back to normal, but i miss him so much and am scared. I'm scared 'cause i know that the chances of me surviving without him, are low. I love him, but i miss him so so much. And i don't know what to do or how to get him back? I love you C.A
Please help me?
Posted: Wed Nov 23, 2011 5:17 pm
thank you to everyone that's got this to 149 views and not bothered to try and actually help. thanks.
Posted: Tue Nov 29, 2011 9:40 pm
I'm sorry to tell you this, but it seems like he was using you as anchorage. He may have been doing to you what you were doing when you were with "J." He was flirting with you to get over someone; or he couldn't make up his mind between you and someone else. He may have feelings for you, but he's obviously confused right now. I would suggest moving on from him, and if in time he comes around, try giving him a second chance--but don't jump into the "I love yous" so quickly.
Posted: Wed Oct 31, 2012 1:33 am
I can relate..
Early in september, my boyfriend broke up with me, and I felt like it was my fault. Just a week ago, I finally got the truth from him. He'd told me he missed me, and I thought, with the way he was acting, he wanted me back. I was so terribly wrong. He told me he missed "having a 'girl' friend" and "the intimacy." Not me.. or so I felt that way. I feel used and toyed with, but this isn't a new feeling. I thought we were going to get back together, part of me wished we did.. the other half, not so much. But anyways, he finally told me the truth -- he didn't love me anymore. After I told him how I felt.. after admitting to him everything I felt regret for and would regret telling him. I also got a reason why he wanted out of the relationship. He claimed our personalities were so different, but I felt that wasn't completely true. He told me recently, during the second heartbreak, that I was a downer.. and that it was personality thing. I felt he was telling me I was doomed to be alone. Doomed to feel sad, envious, broken, and unwanted. The funny thing is, at first, I didn't feel anything, I felt numb and content. I don't know if the sadness now is because I feel the lonesomeness and the yearning for love, or if I'm back to "missing" him, and are in denial about it. However, I'd like to ask that maybe fate spare you with turmoil and pain, and give you a chance to move on, even if it seems impossible to me. There's always the chance he just needs time to think about it while you're off living life normally, giving him quite a lot of space. It may seem cruel, but if he really does care for you and isn't being honest or clear about it, then he'll soon realize it once you're gone and no longer chasing him. And if it's not meant to be, then all you can do is move on, right? Even if it means going after other boys to busy yourself, as selfish and wrong as that sounds. After all, the only way to get over one love is to find another, right?
I wish you luck and happiness. <3