My First Attempt

Have you written a story? Even a poem? Post your artistic creations here!

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Re: My First Attempt

Post by Havoc78 » Wed Mar 12, 2003 12:18 am

thats good B)
She will never know that im the best she'll never have.-BOWLING FOR SOUP

do you really wanna be like them. do you really wanna be another trend. do you wanna be a part of the crowd.

cause i dont ever wanna be you dont ever wanna be just like you-Good Charlotte

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Re: My First Attempt

Post by pmfman » Wed Mar 12, 2003 2:30 pm

that was good, maybe you should makje your next one alitle bigger
"we have troubles all around us, but we are not defeated" - Corinthians

"only two things are infinate, the universe and stupidity" - Albert Einstein

"People standing on escalators are a testimony to human lazyness" - Christ Novolestic

"Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are" - Kurt Cobain

"Just because your paraniod it dosnt mean there not after you" - Kurt Cobain

"Peddle the ass that god gave you, buy nitrous" - Dave Ghrol

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Re: My First Attempt

Post by Flowers For The Dead » Wed Mar 12, 2003 2:36 pm

and what a way to begin, that was great. keep it up.
Fill up the bucket with whatever ya got.

Make sure it's somethin' that the bucket likes alot.

One day CUT FREE!!!!

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Re: My First Attempt

Post by Sky » Wed Mar 12, 2003 4:32 pm

It is understandable... nop rhyme.... but not alot of detail. Lot of readers point of veiw and emotion are included in this poem! :) Dustin it is a GREAT poem and especially good if it is your first attempt at writing a poem... delicious lol
<span style=\'font-family:Times\'Something told the wild geese

It was tine to go

Through the fields lay golden

Something wispered- "SNOW"

Leaves were green and stirring


But beneath the warm feathers

Something cautioned- "FROST"

All the sagging orchards

Steamed With amber spice

But each wild breast stiffened

At rembered ice

Something told the wild geese

It was time to fly-

Summer sun was on their wings

Winter in their cry

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