i need advice

[popsicle]

if youre a past reader of anything ive posted, you know the drama and pain i go thru with my best friend.

well the other day i had kind of a revelation or an apifany. whatever you want to call it.

there are legitamate reasons why i dont like most of the people i hang out with where i live. so i chose only to hang out with them very rarely and usually not for very long.

well, there are reasons, different tho equally important to me, why i dont like brandon. and im begining to think there arent any real reasons why i should continue to put myself thru what he puts me thru.

the point is, im starting to think that maybe its time that i start thinking about walking away from him soon.

obviously im not exactly strong enough to decide right now, but the thought is there.

i just want to know what other people think who know me and the issue on here.

[anonymous08]

hmmmm . . .

i don't quite know what to tell you at the moment, dear. i agree that some of the things he does to you are not rite, but he's also done a lot of good.

maybe try making a pros and cons list?

[popsicle]

the way things are going right now, the things hes doing, not to me but the things hes doing, are making me rethink us.

but then i think, he stayed my friend while i was cutting and he didnt like that.

but then i also think, he wanted to help me. what hes doing isnt like me cutting tho i dont agree with it. its not a situation were id help. he doesnt care what i think.

and so i think, should i take what hes givin me, helping me quit and the such and walk away?

right now we havent really talked in maybe a week.

i really want a break from him for a few days.

i need time to think.

im not very strong, i may just take it and stay.

are we really as complicated and crazy as i think we are?

brandon and i?

[popsicle]

im wondering if he knows his new friendship, is destroying ours.

and i know im not important enough to chose over anything.



and im scared. i dont think i love him anymore.

[Lena]

I think the fact you're asking these questions and doubting the friendship says a lot.



I think your gut instinct is probably right. You have instinct, valid feelings and facts to go on here. I think they all point towards the same thing - that something isn't right in the friendship.



I guess there are two ways to approach this. Either you can move on from the friendship because its causing you pain. Or you can talk to him about the fact its causing you pain and ask if you can both work on certain things together to change the relationship.



Taking a break to think and put things in perspective sounds like a good idea.



One thing to remember is that you are important and you should be valued - if he doesn't choose you, hes losing out on a wonderful person.



If you don't love him anymore, then you don't love him anymore.... I guess its a scary thing when that happens, because its unfamiliar, but it can be a good thing - there are good reasons why you feel like that. You will find more friends, and there are always people who care and who will want to be your friend - I have yet to meet someone who doesn't have any friends or anyone who cares.



How is are things right now?



Take care,



Lena.

[Kit]

I agree with Lena on this one. I think you should talk to him about your feelings. Maybe write a letter to him? That could help.



How are things going now?

[popsicle]

the problem with talking to him about it, is that he tells me in wrong and that i need to get over it.

[Kit]

Then try to talk to him about it again and if he say's that then say that you'll be on your merry way to finding new and better friends. Just perferably not that way! lol. You don't deserve that hun! Make new friends. You're lovable so go for it! You'll be happier in the long run.

[Lena]

Kits right. If he doesn't like it, thats his problem and you can find - and deserve - better friends.



The thing is - you're not wrong. You're uncomfortable and unhappy with something - therefore something should be done to put it right. If he doesn't care enough to want to work with you on it, I'd question the friendship.... You're worthy of better friends than that.







Take care, dear.



Lena

[popsicle]

im not gonna have to worry about decided if i should walk away from him or not.

everyday it seems more that im being replaced by his new friend.

i know what it feels like when youre being replaced, its happened before.